Diary of 6 Winter Remote Games. Issue 12. Season 2017 / 18.

Saturday 17 February, 2018

10game.


Prayer…
Greetings of the reality in which all elements
  and all living and non-living beings appear as if
themselves, in which they are for a while
  exist and which then come back ...


Making decisions, the warrior is not afraid to remain alone, because he is a free being who proudly bears responsibility for his life. Even when a warrior acts differently than others, and remains without their approval and support, he does not feel himself a victim, because for him to live the life of an impeccable warrior is a high honor.
Teun Marez.

So, the season of winter remote games is nearing completion. Starting in mid-December, the participants went to a long power rally, with a length of 10 to 12 games, with the duration of the game in each game about a week.

The feature of Remote games is that this power draw lasts

  • not one hour (the duration of the consultation), not three days (the duration of internal retreats with Rama) and not even 10 days (the duration of the Samadhi retreat),
  • but more than 2.5 months.
Starting this long game, the participants do not yet know what awaits them ahead and with what life experiences they will meet during the game. And since, unlike in-home retreats, distance play is conducted in absolutely real conditions of life, it is also quite natural that with the participants there are both beautiful and the most complex events filled with dramatic experiences. How will the player play? Surrender to the position of the victim or smile to Consciousness, and experience the experience totally?

It is during the distance Games that the player's hardening takes place and his ability to play continuously is formed. From the participant of remote games, a real player is brought up, who is able to play under any circumstances of life. But even if, unnoticed by himself (under the "respectful" excuses of the dwarf), a participant descends from a distance, getting stuck at a certain level of his abilities, he is trained by this experience, as in the future he does not give up ...

About how the players played the drawing of life in the 10th game, read in this news release.

  • I'm in the moment. Life from the moment is something ... Communicating with the child from Love (this is quite another communication). With mother from acceptance and understanding, with the husband (from knowledge). I perceive people differently (not out of my mind).
  • Capturing that I do not think that there will be in the future. For example, I have to travel, but I do not even have a thought (usually in such situations I'm preparing, I'm thinking about what to take.) How will I go there, plans-bells, but here ...). Can catch the wave when in the moment. That's what it means to be in the flow. Letting go. But at the same time - I am collected, I am in memory (not "fly away").
  • Rolled on the rink. Was in the moment. It turns out so magically (not in terms of evaluation, but in terms of describing). Feel the air with nostrils, touch the blade of ice, move, watch the body, for the thoughts, feel the feelings and miss it is awareness.
  • Of course, this game was turning for me. Everything has changed (yes, this generalization, but it is). I'm different, calm confident. Cleared space. I had a presentiment that this game is needed, this experience is needed. And really this game is special.
  • The sucker may have fallen off. How I was afraid of losing my husband (I was even afraid of thinking about it, but now it's so light). The magic has disappeared. Everything fell into place. There is no sacrifice. I did not even do anything special (there is no my effort) for that Will of Consciousness! Gratitude from rest.
  • My husband comes home from work, I cook dinner, he starts to sneer about the missing cabbage, heaviness in my head, injustice, senselessness, caught, breathe, watch and calmly say, we are both farming where you were, when cabbage was lost, something is trying to insert, but it's already fun both.
  • Squeezing in the chest, fear - the desire to retreat, the thought "it is of no use to anyone", came to see my granddaughter, with her another grandmother sat waiting for me, quickly zasobiralas and left. The child's hands are dirty, the priest is dirty, shaggy, rally, did not play on the go, live in practice. The role of "laying henmother", protection from fear of loss, abandonment, loneliness. I watch the loneliness, I see how the dwarf organizes all this for me, I understand that the granddaughter is happy with the dirty booty, glad that grandmother, is glad to see me. Independent, the priest still wipes badly, but herself. Hands are dirty, because they do not allow water to include, shaggy, so the hair is resting from the braids. In general, the child grows and develops, learns to look after itself only my mind draws horrors and tries to make me believe them. I see my link to the order and the condition of the mission, they check me. Who came up with order, mind, ego, is being led, I believe, I resist reality. It's good that she did not include the victim, but she washed it with her jokes, combed it, fed it, put it to sleep.
  • Zalozhennost left nostril, body aches, sadness desire to change, "he infected me", I blame - the victim, the husband fell ill ORZ. What's terrible if I get infected? I will not bring my granddaughter, that she would not get sick, abandonment, senselessness. I observe senselessness, I agree with reality, and I will not see my granddaughter; from the position of responsibility, one can take preventive measures, vitamins, etc. I watch and feel the tide, the body becomes hot, sweat is allocated, the stuffiness simply disappeared, I treated myself, finally I felt the benefit from my tides. It's funny, happy - the desire to live.
  • Expansion in the right hypochondrium, anger - the desire to fight, the conjecture "a woman has a son, besides his wife," the thought "the granddaughter will suffer". And if she suffers, it is so unfair, impotence, senselessness. Projected. Recollection, when the pope left, senseless scandals, feel sorry for himself (victim), abandonment. I watch the meaninglessness, the understanding that both my father and mother needed their experience, me too, otherwise I would have gotten caught in a relationship. I return to my granddaughter, which means she needs such an experience. And I see the game, because nothing happened, and not the fact that it will happen at all, but the mind has set up horrors and makes you believe. I do not believe you mind, but I respect your cunning and resourcefulness, a worthy opponent.
  • The girlfriend called to take a walk. At first I decided not to walk with her. She went. I began to talk about the school Z "DAR" OBEY. Sow the seeds. I realized. Who sees his "importance"? My character does not need to compete with anyone. Do not do anything. Seeds sowed Consciousness. Who am I that has decided or not decided? Who wants to enlighten whom or to ignore whom? Everything is done by Consciousness. We need to identify and identify with the true. Consciousness itself "skips", watching the change of all illusory.
  •  Granddaughter - ten years - came to visit. She says that her parents do not "hear" her. They seem to listen, but it turns out that they have not heard. Again you need to talk. In relationships with girlfriends - girls often abandon her, deceive her, condemn her. She feels lonely. I see her wisdom. Her Soul experiences. He says that he accepts himself and his friends as they are. At the Soul there is a purification. This is not a granddaughter. Its role is played by Consciousness. The age of the character is not important. I - Consciousness watch my game.
  •  We walked with my girlfriend. We talked about my friend T .. I came home, then T. came to visit me. She said that B. became ill - her only love. His daughter also told me which hospital he was in. T. Does not want to call them - the phone number does not want to be searched. He can not forgive B .. He chose her friend. The girlfriend has already passed away. Who I do not want to forgive? Where can I not pacify my own worth, pride? I realized that I am holding on to past events. Where I am? Who am I? Let go of everything. Forgive everyone, thankfully with love. He who I am, not affected by anything. Do not get attached to anything. I am the moment now. Nobody here. Consciousness wanted to identify, play the illusion of separation. Wake up. Remember yourself.
  •  Meditations take place in motion. There is no one who would meditate. Awareness of yourself in every moment now. I thought about what death is. You need to leave now. Soon I will leave this body that gloriously served me. Through him, I passed the experience. I did everything that I could. There is no death. Today I confessed my husband in love. When he says that he loves me, I kept silent. I realized that I went into reasoning, into the mind. I did not trust, I did not trust - is it really so? I am now the moment that I wanted to speak about LOVE. So I have it MUCH INSIDE! It is unlimited! All is enough. Who told me? Is there anyone I explain? There is no one. That's what I love. And I do not like this at all. There is no such thing really. I am everything. Love. There is no such division. There is no second. I am the whole. One. Eternal. Infinite. I confessed my love to myself.
  •  My character was in the center of the city, where there was not a hundred years, observation of separation from randomly moving people (as in an anthill). But such a friendly separation, not painful. Who is separated? Consciousness, identified with a character who has a sense of fear of death - the imminent end, the absurdity of this life. Aah, well, that's a pity ... Hi, victim! As a continuation, after watching the film "Move Up" _ a terrific, life-affirming film, the heroine directly asks the lover, the deadly patient: "If you have only a few seconds left to live, how will you live?" The question directly to my character. Who loses? Haha! Who is looking for meaning in this life? Just going up and stopping inside. The emptiness is playing ... Passed by the exciting energy of fear and dissolved into eternity.
  •  The second time the parcel does not reach the addressee, indignation, it is required to understand, the relative has to pay back the way of sending the parcel, the desire to roll the complaint. Who is annoyed? Who is the offender and who is offended? No one, the mind is silent. Before "injustice" it did not come. Yes, at the post office a mess, it's not the first time on our mail. It is necessary to understand where the weak link is, and internally calm and accepting and such a turn of events, leading to interaction and playfulness ...
  • Electricity was cut off unexpectedly, an accident at the substation. Planned plans broke loose, food was lost in the refrigerator, everything that the intellect habitually broadcast in a panic. Realizing this turn of sleep as well - the illusory manifestation of the moment and the feeling of excitement, the balance was restored, the anxiety settled down in the night rest and pacification. Haha! Everything was shattered by itself.
  • Talking with the eldest in the house, comments about the illegal redevelopment of his son, you need permission. There is irritation, anger, there is no desire to participate in it? In general, it is right, the letter of the law must be observed. Identification with fear of punishment, negativchik included, can be mate. losses. Listening attentively, she translated the conversation into another channel, promising to understand. Inside, calmness, understanding of the moment of interaction of different poles of manifestations, each has its own truth. In self-realization - the truth is one - just to be, without interfering with any interactions ...
  • I am in Moscow. Granddaughter does not listen, he screams. I ask: why are you shouting? He answers: I'm not in the mood today, you know? There are positive moments of my conflicts with my son. There is now no such importance, significance of oneself. A good school of communication with his son: no ambition, no importance, no conflict. Calmly answer her: to do. And I'm leaving. I do not control. After a while, M. did what I asked her.
  • I talk with MM, declares: I want to go only with my main family. I ask: who am I? You are a secondary member of my family. I'm starting to play. Well, then you are a secondary member of the family for me, and now I will only care about your mother, she is the main family for me. I say: and now for your future children your mother will be a secondary family. The daughter at this time is coming and laughing says: Well, I must, I'm extra. M. says: no, no, I will teach my children that my mother will be their main family for them. We talked. During the day, I do not react to many of M.'s requests. At the end of the day, M. comes up, hugs and says: I realized that all relatives are the main family.
  • Transforming. Strain in the upper part of the spine. Quarrels with her son, with her husband. My state determines the thought for this event. Disinterestedness develops with complete confidence in Life. Everything that happens is unreal. As in Yoga Vasishtha: worship God with all states - even a fight. Feel the splendor of the game. Nausea. All states are not bad and not good. Live any state, what's the difference. All the only concepts. The consequence of this thinking is a state of peace and joy.
  • I went into the kitchen and suggested that I make tea in a small thermos and take it with me, S. loudly replied that you were doing a little, and I'll take myself great, I was indignant that he rejected me and decided to separate us separately. Exploding and saying that I wanted to help, and he told me so ... C. threw out the phrase that S. my appearance in the kitchen, I spoiled the mood, so I say ... then I spoil your mood so that I want to help? S. left and fell silent, and said that he did not have anywhere to eat, that's typical behavior of S. so did my father, he left, I went into the room, and S. and I continue to grumble, and the woman can bear the brain and spoil the mood S. was discouraged the fact that I accepted his challenge in that I can spoil the mood by going up to him and once again said yes I can spoil, and still I can cheer up! S. smiled broadly, and together we fell on the bed laughing for a long time, eventually we eat ...
  • We sit in the cinema, the reaction of laughter to the intimate scenes of adult women sitting behind us introduced me into unpleasant feelings again and again, I was uncomfortable, suggested either they do not have revelations with the second half, or it was their defensive reaction, but the unpleasant feelings I, why is it unpleasant for me? with S. I can talk about sex though, when, sex is often different, not squeezed, but what then? I dip into my childhood, when I heard my parents I was ashamed not for them, but for myself. I could not communicate with my mother on this topic, it was a closed topic and was never touched by me or my mother, even when I was growing up, I was ashamed to ask, although the questions were, but I was silent. And it was scary for me to get into early contact with a guy under 18 years old. This is not lived emotional experience, live shame for not being able to communicate on the topic of sex with my mother, right here in the cinema, letting neighing neighbors, let me be ashamed of my childhood, in which the topic of sex was not available. Left the cinema, S. immediately began talking about neighing neighbors, I had no reaction in the body, I calmly said the version that maybe they do not have such a house of sexual scenes as we do and maybe that's why they laughed, but said S. is possible this is so, we went discussing the film.
  • We invited my mother to visit, my mother became intoxicated. drank cognac, later she began to attract attention and threatened that she would leave, this was more than once she was freaking out when she did not like something and left, but I was silent, agitation, anxiety for wrong behavior, I allow myself to be whatever I want, now I say that it's her choice to leave and that I do not want this at all, but the fact that you want to leave is your invention, that I do not want to see you, I want you to stay, and as you want, Mom continued to sit and be in our company . Imprinting - this is my father's behavior, I just repeated that he and the fact that my mother did not leave it was a miracle, because as a child she always resisted her father's actions, but now my father played in me and she stayed. As a result, the evening was excellent, we talked about all the topics of interest to us, we laughed, had time to resent and accept the behavior of each of us, I allowed myself to tell what was unpleasant for my mother to listen to, and she rather resignedly also resigned herself.
  • I realize that I myself create reality and only I am responsible for my choice. My weak place was let loose, I used to think it was normal to be in the Stream, but I did not see the victim. Fear of being responsible for yourself, the thought of what others will say, evaluations, feelings of rejection, fear of loneliness. Who evaluates the mind-dwarf? I understand that the mind is illusory and that I just can not manage it. I change the program, I go to meet myself, manifesting myself creatively! I feel when I start to act, manifest, become full and sacrifice to dissolve in the breath of Life!
  • Improvisation today showed during classes with those wishing to lose weight, they had to be more rigidly stated and then it dawned on me, that's me, the victim that needs to be kept in the regime. Yes, I'm getting collected and whole, that's what's important. I realize that this is an experience! To improvise is obtained in the external world, but when, remaining alone with one another, somehow it turns out not very much, to leave the state of the victim. Now I see it and I know that improvisation is a creative move towards the manifestation of Consciousness. I try to change myself and swagger. How, only I catch myself in the victim's chair, I track, I think 5-4-3-2-1-release from the chair, amuse myself, I play with myself, because besides me there is nobody.
  • I walk along the street, I feel a sleepy, tense state, I remember the word courage. At the meeting, an unfamiliar passer-by, I play, I say, hello. A passer-by greeting, looking, I say good weather, is not it, all the best. I feel the courage and go on, so I greeted several people and felt inside courage. Non-standard manifestation of oneself.
  • Playing with children in class, I felt how it is possible to combine activities and courage when I imitate children. Also in classes with adults, very often I enter courage and become myself, removing the mask of seriousness. Improvise on the go, because the coach is a role, consciousness does not affect.
  • It's true with men, improvise, it turns out frighteningly, I try and understand, fear restricts, I see it, I breathe, I feel shame, rejection, thought, yes why they need it, they must show themselves, fear loneliness. I live. Yes, the first moment is exciting, it's normal. It's just a role, I Consciousness is watching it. I show myself with men and get courage, because besides me there is no one!
  • I myself create problems, and I decide, that's how I play all my life. The problem is the habit of acting, the fear of the future, it is an illusion, a horse waiting for hay. A master is the Consciousness that controls. I'm a horse striving for Consciousness! And the coachman, too! All are one! Only manifesting myself in different roles, I know myself, coming out of limitations and pseudomaskings of seriousness. I show myself creatively improvising and I get courage and freedom to be myself. I am the manifestation of Consciousness!
  • Drawing, at work helped the guy prepare a gift for his wife, normal interactions, and then an unexpected rally, went to see what kind of cookies for tea they bought, and he says that they are not tasty, everything come from here, it's such a joke, but I felt strong feelings . I went to the store and along the way I accepted feelings, when I came, there was no offense, as if there was nothing. Also today there was a headache, a condition from which I want to escape, in the evening I came home, in practice I worked out rejection, loneliness. The symptoms are gone.
  • The girl is calling from the second job, and I am touched by her manner of communication, the feeling that she does not respect anyone. I understand that this is in me. That I am the same, only about my interests, and around I do not respect people. I realize that I'm such with men, that I have this kind of communication and this attitude towards men, as this girl is talking to me. I thanked her for showing me. Traced fear of humiliation and physical violence from this tone. I realize on what line this is going - grandfather Ivan, perhaps even from someone, will need to consider. Presented a physical reprisal, I miss feelings. I tracked down that the headache is a fear of mistakes, and if I make a mistake, then a sad future awaits me, without money, without respect, went into it, into this image, my head stopped ached.
  • In the morning, the resistance to go on extra. work, contact with feelings of loneliness and sadness, in practice I live these feelings, I went. With the leader I'm keeping at a distance, I have my own game, I have my own game. Usually the manager does not listen to me much, so I chose the option of silence, and I accept the feeling of loneliness. Earlier, perhaps, I wanted to talk to get people to hear me. And now I realize that I can not prove anything to anyone, and I do not have the energy for this defense, so I go into silence, I miss feelings of loneliness, abandonment, nothing happens, life goes on. And on the contrary, from the fact that I am silent, I get strength, my throat is in order, I will speak when they are ready to hear me.

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