11-12game.

Prayer…
Greetings of the reality in which all elements
  and all living and non-living beings appear as if
themselves, in which they are for a while
  exist and which then come back ...

• Formulating a new belief about this aspect of life: I trust Life, she knows! I accept any experience, for this is what I need! Life teaches, I'm learning! There is no death, then what can stop me? I see fear in the "eyes", and I do not see what you can be afraid of. Whatever the times and circumstances one is unchanging, live and live life as it is.
• I took my granddaughter to my mom, because she had a cold, N. met with friendliness, saying that children always get sick, do not worry, it's not known who infected whom. My inability to do so is that I honestly confessed my discomfort and could infect my granddaughter.
• Heaviness in the left shoulder, sadness - the desire to change, today died, our dog. He was ill, he was not treated and did not survive these severe frosts. He left, as befits a sentry dog ​​at the doorstep of the house, crawled out of the last forces to the porch. A sense of insecurity, loneliness, all this with an intensity of 1.5-2 points. I watch loneliness, there is a transformation, a realization that withdrawal was perceived as a relief from suffering. It was harder to see his daily agony, fading. The realization that I protest against old age, expressed by squeezing in the chest, an emotion of sadness - a desire to change, feelings of helplessness, abandonment and senselessness, an intensity of 5 points. I observe the meaninglessness, the transformation, I see directly how the mind is amused when it is conducted on his intrigues. When consciousness needs to live through my character's experience of helplessness, protest, do not protest, you'll have to live. On the one hand, you can passively watch, change, aging the body, on the other hand, you can take care of it, properly nourish, take care of, remembering the mission of "not getting attached."
• During this game I realized how important it is to live every day as a new incarnation. Life is a moment. What will be the next moment is unknown. Thinking that a lot of time is ahead - in this way, you can spend your life on unnecessary things. It's important to be in every moment now. This is the only reality. To dedicate the incarnation to the Soul's task is to unite with the Source. To be in the only reality - the moment now. How important it is to wake up is to get out of ignorance. See Maya's attempts to put her to sleep. Play. Wake up. Go to the full SUCCESS of the ego. Purify the Soul. Make the installation on the upward movement, towards purity, satvic energy. To realize - I - Consciousness - peace, silence, silence. Just being in the moment here and now.
• The most important thing that I have happened during the time of this game is the Surrender of the Ego - this is a stubborn, significant, dictating, implacable Ego - I know, I can, stronger, better ... Everything has dissolved. Acceptance of your destiny, weakness. Cessation of the STRUGGLE. Everything you need to live my character is already written. You just need to relax and just live, accepting everything that Consciousness sends me. The realization that the only doer is Consciousness, the only reality is the moment now. The one who I am - not a character, not a thought, not a mind, not an emotion. The one who suffers - really does not exist. There is nothing to be tied to. Nobody here. Fears, death - does not exist.
  hold on to that. Everything is not important. I saw how the mind tries to fill with fears, tendencies. I realized that ignorance leads to destruction, pulls into darkness, into suffering. Just need to stop believing Carlik. Wake! Wake up! You just need to remember who I am. Once identified. I'm already here without effort.
• Remote game coincided with my character with the operation. Disease is the result of ignorance, of falling asleep, of not accepting everything as it is. Disease is the impetus to my further Awakening, Surrendering Ego. I went to the operation with full acceptance. To all the will of Consciousness. There was no fear. There is no death. There is no such. Care. Transition. I became different. I have a different life now. At first the ego rested. The ego whispered so cleverly - it "knows how it should be." Has reconciled. There was another VISION. I try to be aware every moment. I let go of all the tendencies. I forgave all of myself, too. Does not owe anything to anyone. She began to express herself and act more freely. I began to react differently. I began to listen to my desires, to characters with LOVE and gratitude. My character became more harmonious with her husband, daughter's family, grandchildren and others. When I let go of my fears, my attachments, everyone became freer and calmer. But there is no one. I am freedom, peace! It is very interesting! It's interesting to watch everything! I am grateful to Consciousness for this experience, I thank the Consciousness for the Master leading me along the Path. For the GAME OF Consciousness. I just have now. Awake. Cleared. I'm here.
• The picture of life is added as 2 + 2 = 4. In the key of self-awareness, the manifested side of life unfolds according to my (Consciousness) of the Game. Fears, wrapped in conceptual beliefs and expectations, turn into the illusion of thought, like the thought itself, its product is everything that is seen, felt, feels ... And then the manifested life of Consciousness, unidentified, proceeds along the tracks of spontaneity, playfulness, fullness with the various colors of Genesis without mental voltage. The most important thing is the emergence from the process of waiting again for the mind about the future, some kind of mythical, bright future, or escape from the shadow of the past, while staying in the present moment, feeling the moment gives free movement of confidence to the Existence, where the illusion of death turns into an aspect of the Game - experiences of the acuity of the manifested sensations of the identified and unidentified Consciousness.
• It is difficult to cling to the Absolute - the emptiness of Being - with the mind, but experience helps to distinguish where the illusory essence is, and where the true and this is the main thing. And now the main task is to continue the game in the key of self-awareness - to live any experience of not being attached to an external source of energy (and in my Consciousness game, the father, son, grandson, relationship, Service, etc. are disinhering factors, a true void nature, where the fear of loss is misplaced ...
• Much has become unimportant in the manifested life of the identified Consciousness, habitual defenses fall away. Only now understanding is becoming clearer - Awakening is the experience of disidentification with illusory manifestations of the present moment. Yes, Dar received - the power of Knowledge is not to be frightened and not to fall into captivity fantasy illusory mind. But, the journey, already more conscious, continues in this incarnation. Consciousness is smiling ... Yahuu !!!
• Assembled the puzzle quickly. My daughter was surprised, did not expect. All the time he says: you need to give your brain work. I wanted to say that I can do a lot. Caught myself on bragging. No. I learn to keep silent, to talk only about business. Attention to breathing. She was silent. Internal satisfaction.
• M. plays in the mobile phone in the game and eats. I do not allow her to do this. She does not obey. Previously, she would become indignant and complain to her daughter. Now she played a role. Firm and confident, forbade her to play, while speaking gently and calmly. She obeyed surprisingly quickly.
• Went to the polyclinic for directions for kids. Their daughters were discharged, but she lost them. Having come into the doctor's office, she received such irritation from her, she simply chided me. And I played a role and allowed to be humiliated. I was tolerant, but I was involved, but it did not affect me. I need to decide the question. The doctor writes out one direction, but the other refuses. Well, the game is a game. The muscles on his face were tense. I left my office and called my daughter. The daughter said that the doctor wrote out the direction for the second child and in the doctor's records, it's written down. Entering the office, the doctor agreed with the arguments and already quietly prescribed the direction. Watching your thoughts and feelings was interesting. I liked how I played the part.
• The daughter again berates M. and this is a long time. And I have such calm. Do not interfere. Let me be. And from time to time in my garden, too, get stones. Stop: I tell myself. Pride looks up. Live humiliation. It turns out easy. Internal peace does its job. I cooked dinner. The daughter did not eat. I think this is her business. Previously, my behavior was predictable, I would be offended and would have to get ready to go home. Now she enjoyed eating with her granddaughter. I'm in the moment Now and I enjoy this game of Consciousness. After 2 hours the daughter, as if nothing had happened, spoke to me. Still never in my life I lived so humiliated totally and consciously.
• I see the changes that are taking place in my life. At last I started moving again. During the year I did not exercise and moved very little. Now the desire to move has returned. I follow the bodily sensations. If possible, I work with them. Changed attitude to her husband, children, parents, people. There were fewer complaints, assessments, grievances, expectations. Thoughts are an illusion, they are unreal. When I realize this, I turn my attention to the breath. But I still have a lot of thoughts. In terms of events, too, there are changes. They are insignificant, gradual. Little shots. But, along with this, there is peace and acceptance. No, as before, the desire for sudden change, all at once, here and now. There was acceptance and humility. Just watching Life. Who am I? I am Consciousness. I know myself, getting the experience I need. While this is more theoretical understanding. But, after all, the realized Game has just begun ... I thank Life, Rama, Sangha, Academy of Leela, all Players from the heart!
• For example, a friend says that her stepfather has 4 tickets for the show of the European circus. But she does not know if her mother will go and, accordingly, whether she will take us or not. I said yes internally, we might not be invited. And a stirring feeling: "rejection" slipped by. Late at night a friend writes: we go to the circus. And again: yes, some passing through the joy of the opportunity to please the daughter.
• Aggression to the body and to the physical life of this aggression. The consequences of the realization of the desire for physical death. But because the desire came from abandonment and rejection (fear of loneliness and the fear of losing love), then the victim is strong. The accusation of unconscious life for what happened. Awareness of this moment. I finally cleaned my astral body with the light, I follow the symptoms of the body: running itching around the places of bites and tingling in different places. I understand that these are psychological symptoms expressing fear of the effects of bites in the form of the possibility of disease (nachitalas). After practicing through a sudden strong bite, I find a hunter in my sock. Outside the house. 99% put on linen lice. I consider this as a wink of Consciousness, like, on the right track ... In the evening, passing through the psychological tingling of the body (fear of bite) and breathing, I recall two situations when I had hair (grade 8) and pubic (2 years) lice. Shame, discrepancy image of goodness, rejection, fear of losing love and fear of loneliness. Gratitude of Life for the rally, for such a coma of emotions that came out and which still need to live. Pandora's box opened - my anger at the repressed victim.
• For the first time in the last three months, it has been possible to enter into a conscious dream. Began to look for him. First I flew down and realized that I was not there: I nearly fell into his grave. Has returned. And was where he is, sad and lost. I tried to talk to him. Remembering your knowledge about this world. However, it turned out badly. S. appeared and began to shout at him, at me. Then I fell into a dream. I experienced such hatred for S. and blamed, screamed at her. ... But this has awakened me. I calmed down. And already with warmth she told her her point of view on the situation. She calmed down and listened to me. However, awareness did not last long. In the next story I fell asleep: S. puts forward to me and loved one a condition: prove that the soul exists, and for this I must make myself an injection, leave the body, and from that side already let know that I am alive. I do not know if I accepted the conditions, but the rest of the dream I was looking for my body and could not find it, again blaming it. Woke up in my bed with a surprise that I was in my body.
• The death of L. happened, I look at the body that lies in the coffin. Consciousness shows and tests the reaction. Once I identify, connect with the Source, with the Void basis of being. I am in a non-dualistic contemplation, I remain in the original state of Who I am. Consciousness of self has manifested itself in this very moment. There is no death, it is an illusion. The soul fulfilled its mission, its mission and returned home. Consciousness through this character has gained experience.
• The present moment is manifested without having a past or future ... I go into the staircase and go up to the 3rd floor and hear my mother crying, I just wanted to fall into the fantasy world of the mind in a dream of the second level (in fear of humiliation, rejection, loneliness). Catching itself, instantly Self-aware of Who I am! I allow the moment to manifest as it appears. Consciousness plays, tests your reaction. I am in a non-dual Contemplation in the original state of Who am I! I connect with the Source, with the Voidness of Being. I see the Game of Consciousness. With Love, I go home, let the moment manifest itself as it manifests itself. Mom sits in an armchair holds a father's photo and cries. I let her live her experience. She made her hot tea, she began to talk about her fears, began to ask that her humanly buried with respect for all traditions. Gave her the opportunity to speak out. I watched the manifestation of the moment, felt sadness, lived and missed. All the characters play one actor Consciousness ... There is only the experience that Consciousness lives through through the character ... It's a dream, an illusion ...
• Today is a funeral, there's a lot of frost in the street. I stand and catch myself on the fact that I've fallen into the fantasy world of the mind. The body is frozen, the mind is indignant, that so long is buried and another ceremony, I completely die, I will get sick. Fear of uselessness, loneliness and death. I am in a dream of the second level. Stop!!! Once identified. I'm aware of who I am! Connecting with the Source! I ask Who is freezing, Who's afraid, Is there loneliness and death? Ha-ha-ha! I am in a dream of the first level, the body is very tense --- I relax the body, I breathe, I am in the moment now, I allow the moment to manifest the way it manifests. I see my Game! I watch for bodily sensations and feelings. The energy flowed.
• Excitement, S. recalls that you need to move with the opening of the work, I understand that you need to go for a loan, doubt, fear will be left, loneliness. With what key is my condition connected? not lived experience? Yes. I remembered when S. repeatedly took loans, and I did not want to take responsibility, now S. can not take on himself because it still has, and my credit history is clean. I agree, the reality is that now the moment to believe S. even if the mind does not want to believe him, there is a false belief; that S. deceive me once again. I do not believe in fear, I believe that now there is a time to get out of the false idea of ​​deceiving, the consciousness wants to live through this character this experience.
• In this D.I. I saw how allowed to be a pass in practice, allowed to be imperfect, so I did not have a comment from the conductor of Rama. And from this it seemed to me that I will not survive and will not go to the end of the game without comment, there is not enough strength, but I showed the experience, despite the fact that I attended the thought of weakness from abandoning everything, I wanted to regret myself, the tricks of the mind were caught , it turned out once to be identified with the unskilled character K., it turned out to be R. and see the smile of Consciousness. Persuasion was transformed into a new understanding that this is the same Game, the responsibility for what I do and do not do, I saw the comments. In signs, I was not afraid to be alone, lived what I managed to live.
• S. leaves to meet V., I let go with peace))), without fear of betrayal, I feel benefits because remained calm, because I'm waiting for the buyer, I sold what I came for, there was an alarm, I called S. to take me, but I was not going to be taken away, that's betrayal, and I feel it when I believe in it. I recognize it is not valid. S. has his own idea of ​​life, but I have another, just ask that S. take me, he calmly accepts my request, in the end we did not swear, and the insult did not succeed in seeping. We took our daughter along the way and went home together.
• We leave the car and see that V. brought a large cage, respectively, that in it someone will live and this without my agreement and even without warning, and S. knew about this already during the day, but did not tell me, I was thrown into a fever. The Code recalled the ease and fluidity. I remember that a month ago, V. said that he also wants a pet of his own and I was indignant at first, and then agreed, but he did not buy it and did not bring it, then it was easier thinking that he would not want more, but there is no Consciousness wants me lived this discontent. I call it this: Without me, I was married! The mind says let naori on S. for not telling me, aga-aga, and then I realized that in any case I would scream and would not be happy and does not depend on whether I was warned or not ... Now I silently go home, my character keeps distance from S., I observe discontent, clear understanding of the drawing from under the tishka, I keep trying to accept the betrayal S. The key is imprinting, my mother swore at her father for his unpredictability as a child. not coherence with her knowing that she will refuse perhaps I saw it with my own eyes. I remember that in the house we had animals 3 dogs, 2 hamsters, 2 parrots, which gnawed wallpaper. Precisely the rejection of the mother of spoilage or the breakdown of property is just about what she did not like, and so my father kept ruining and ruining everything at home when he was drunk so that I could see how my mother appreciates more property, not people. What do I appreciate more? The fact that I do not want to make a decision without me? Yes! Not the desire that V. thought that I was picking on him and complaining about his mother-in-law, and so I can not make a comment B.? Yes. Fear of being bad, rejected S. Punishment key. After the analysis, I continued to keep distance with S., he tried in every possible way to find out what was wrong with me, but I knew that if I started, I would definitely express dissatisfaction about the new unexpected pet and thereby maintain my importance, I knew that now it is necessary to live at least to produce new behavior, because Consciousness in the person of S. is waiting for me to blur out anger at him. I continue as if nothing had happened to wash the dishes, then to drink tea. As a result, S. retired reading, and I sat down to send the 10th report. Later I realized the change of perception to the rally, I was already no matter who brought whom, abstinence from screaming was the right choice.

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