Diary of 6 Winter Remote Games. Issue 1. Season 2017 / 18g.

Thursday 14 December, 2017

At a certain point the player goes so far,
that he no longer has any opportunity to turn back,
because he no longer wants to live in the world left behind.
Therefore, he realizes that he has nothing to lose but his own
life, but what does his life cost if he
fetters created by his fellow men?

The Sixth Winter Remote Games, traditionally began with selections. Recall that applications for remote games are accepted until December 1 inclusive.

The path of study in the Academy of Leela differs from all other ways known to man.
For this reason, one should not rush along it lightly - this way should be entered with due care and respect.
Nowadays, in our era, when society is offered all kinds of ways leading to so-called instant enlightenment, some may be disappointed when it finds out that Leela Academy does not promise to give the formula "The Way to Miracles for the Lazy."
We do not mean that students are not able to perform miracles - just to achieve this level it is necessary to undergo a long and difficult training.
Accelerated courses lead to a short career, and, as is known, insufficient knowledge inevitably becomes dangerous knowledge.
It would be dishonest towards the players, assure them that the Path of Learning at Lila Academy is easy, since it's too far from the truth.
To admit, from all the possible ways the path of learning in the Academy Leela is the most difficult.
Only a few people are prepared for the difficulties that accompany the acquisition of knowledge, which is necessary for mastering the higher levels of this noble path.
And yet, given that this path is progressed in small steps, any adult person is able to cope with fairly elementary practices that unbelievably enhance the quality of his life.
In the second stage of the selection, players had to demonstrate self-discipline and firmness of intention by completing the specified task. About how the players coped with the task, read below.

  • Drawing the morning walks, awakened me, because in the morning sattvic energy of Consciousness, silence is hidden, the source of the true moment. Walking sensed the body-conductor, how it breathed, how feelings changed, how thoughts flowed and the moment of silence came, and through the body came into contact with the process of life. I saw and watched the samsara spinning, placing traps of fears and temptations. And this is me. Silence Here, the moment that is hidden and which I'm afraid, because the silence is a void source of reality, and the rest is all illusory. In the morning twilight, there is a moment of transition from darkness to light and this all happens in me. Day and night the game of Consciousness. Watching the process, saw, heard, felt, how Consciousness awakens, how from the silence of Sattva the pure moment begins to manifest the Huns of rajas and tamas, seducing and lulling in the illusory life. Everything is relative, only the moment is always alone. Traced the main fear of death below, the abdomen. Although I know that there is no death, the defense mechanism works and I fall asleep. It's not easy to find yourself in this. I direct attention to myself. After all, I am It! I am the manifestation of Consciousness! Am I asleep or awake? Now I'm awake, I'm paying attention to myself!
  •  Heat. A drizzle of fine rain. The walk itself gives pleasure to the Presence. Awakening is awareness in every moment Now. Observation of all your body states, feelings, thoughts. Allowing everything to be. Consciousness plays through everyone, because we are this Consciousness. Awakening is freedom from the limitations of the mind, understanding oneself as Consciousness. There is a continuous game, but I fall asleep, then I wake up with my eyes closed. There are 2 military men, one passed, the other gave way. A game. I go further. Attention to breathing and thinking: Who am I? Conscious presence in the body. I'm here. I am now. I breathe in full bosom, squaring my shoulders, enjoying the presence, warm weather, sensations in the body. Just be. What is death? In fact, I do not know what it is. I know that there is only Moment Now and it's not stopping. And in some measure I felt this state, now I want to return to him all the time. Life is Presence, Being. Death is the ignorance of who I really am, my ignorance of my true nature. I return from a walk. Drums are pounding on the parade ground. The soldiers are building. Rhythm. One feels. I'm not part of Life, I'm Life itself.
  •     The first days were difficult in terms of running, the body was heavy, but by the middle of the week, awareness was increasing and I already realized these difficult conditions and worked with them on the go. In the middle of the week there was a day when there were no questions to ask, everything was clear and clear, knowledge already exists. On this day I ran and noticed the appearance of heavy bodily sensations, just watched and they came and went. I just have it. On the 5th day in the morning, I felt that my heart was hurting, and jogging intensified the pain, I did a walk and followed it. Of course, the morning rise and darkness helped me sort out. There fear of death and loneliness. When I got home, I practiced and everything was homogenized harmonized. The joy came that through the feeling of loneliness I come to myself, it's a bridge to myself. I also managed to track down the causes of the headache (it occurs when I notice that I differ from the environment and do not match their ideas, fear of rejection, loneliness and death) and I do not accept myself at this moment, I try to remake myself. Instead of going into fear, very scary. Having passed the middle of the task, awareness became a little less, noticed that during the run I leave in thought, merge with them. And it depends on me what to focus on. I switched it to the body, watched the processes in the body.
  • What is awakening? During this week, physically little (relatively) slept. I notice that I can wake up at 4 am. And then the field of meditation and already in motion on the street to observe that there is an awakening. I watched the mind, the reactions. I noticed how the mind and body lacked early morning walks (but she did not go, only on assignment, although the need is noticed). Feeled cold, rain. I watched who thinks. To awaken for me is not to be identified with the mind to see all the non-realness is not involved. Do I sleep or wake up? One day I woke up with a feeling of fear. Sleep of the second level, from the plot felt the fear of death. Lying and watching the numb bottom of the body. I watched the breath (immediately "turned on"), saw a thought that intimidated, looked fear into the "eyes" (remembering death there) allowed to be this sensation. At this moment, I woke up. Where are you? Who are you? During the day, I forget myself. I remember when the anger manifested itself. I notice reaction, thought, feeling give up. Who am I? then what is not affected, let me proceed to these energies. I direct attention to the breath. I'm in the moment. What is illusory and what is real? Real time itself, really a bodily sensation, for them you can "catch", i.e. to understand that I'm in the moment. The rest is an illusion. During the runs, there was a feeling that the cold was not real. I looked at the post, like it is and I see it, but it's dense vibrations, and it's not real. Death is an illusion. All my drawings of these days were reduced to understanding: death is illusory. And just to my topic is the question: What is life and what is death? Of course answering this question the mind was involved. Life is a process, a lesson, a realization, a game, a moment. Death is a mystery, a transition (the finiteness of one beginning of another), an examination. Who are you? I'm not a mind, I'm not a body. Transformation.
  •  The frost was strengthening. On this day, I began to acutely realize - that my true self is plastered with a lot of other I who pull the blanket each to their side. Also sad came, as I distinctly began to understand: to get through to my center I have too few internal forces. On this day, I was not left with feelings of anxiety and foreboding of something terrible and terrible. The whole week I tried to go to bed early, but I did not get anything, how much I would not go to bed, I did not fall asleep until midnight. Since childhood, I fall asleep for one and a half, two hours, I never could sleep in daylight or in an uncomfortable position from kindergarten. I have always treated this as a peculiarity of my body, but now I began to understand that this is a neuropsychic problem. As a result of a week's lack of sleep today, I disappeared and woke up an hour later, and my walk took place not from 6 to 7, but from 7 to 8. It was sad that I moved away from the terms of the assignment, and I would start all over again, still do not have time to finish this test. Whatever it was, I found out for myself the main problems that prevent me from "taking off" and keep me captive to my far from irreproachable not real "I".
  •  Today it is decided to clean the hiking trails from the snow. From falling snow, waving a shovel, sometimes involved in the process, failed, identifying with the idea of ​​the absurdity of his character and condemnation, which at such an early hour of the morning is engaged in an incomprehensible than. Then emerged, realizing its true nature, filling with joy from physical exertion, inner freedom and humility before any circumstances, as a necessary experience of living the reality of any manifested feelings.
    Staying in sorrow, an agreement with the experience of sickness, aging through the father, humility and gratitude, awakening from sleep, where the illusion of loneliness and death is realized, there is an identification with eternity, the immensity of Being.
    In the morning cool, I advance along the snow, here and there I have overcome the icy paths, the gratitude of the Way that reveals the Truth, and let it be not so easy, has burst into tears. Again, who is difficult, who sometimes wants to lead away, convincing in the reality of this world, where the pain and joy, love and suffering and the finale of all death?!. And in this rally, Consciousness wants to play, entangling itself, but the experience will not give you already lost in your "fun" ...
  •  Walked with pleasure. I love the morning freshness, mystery, when only this illusory world starts to move, the fuss gradually amplifies. There are no expectations. There is only a moment now. In the nature there are natural changes, beyond any program, nature wakes up without the effort and pressure of someone and something. It was dark, the rare stars shimmered, the month "hung" with an unusually narrow strip at the bottom - and gradually it glows and brightens. Warm weather is replaced by windy days, unexpected snowfalls. I realize myself through this body, thoughts, emotions. All changeable is unreality. Illusion intends to involve in falling asleep. I wake up. It's a dream, an illusion. I'm not a mind, not a body. I am all one, one, indivisible. No time. Awakening is awareness of simple being. Awareness in every moment of the moment now. Drawing of Consciousness - continuation of walks on the fourth day after the operation
  • Going out into the street was surprised by the beauty, at night a small snowball fell, the trees stand curly against frost, a light frost, it's nice to walk in the mornings. Who am I? There is an answer, I, the soul that came to this world with my task, I know ... How fair, do I fulfill my mission? When I do not fulfill, life prepares signs, events, not accepting, arguing with reality, suffering begins. There is an understanding of how everything is arranged, what the carlos follows from and which leads away from awareness, here is the focus of the game, then who am I? I'm a player playing this life.
    I went another route, in the village wake up early, and I like this moment when the light in the windows lights up in the course of my movement, looked toward the city, very beautifully, everything is painted with lights, the plane goes on landing, saw a landing, delight. Everything is alive, everything is moving, so what is life? Movement and change, the ability to love and the ability to let go, it's joy and pain, it's cacophony and silence. Then, what is awakening is the acceptance of all this, then who am I a player, whether I woke up - wake up, what is real is only the moment now, is there death - it is NOT!
  •  Today is the last walk. the first few days it was difficult to go out into the street, but as we approached the end of the walk in the body there was a cheerful and full awakening of the body. This is if you take one walk, as a process. And if you take all seven days, then by the end of this process, already woke up before the alarm clock, got up with pleasure and even high, went for a walk with a clear head)). I'm browsing the diary of walks. For all time only heard the cock once. Walked almost always by different roads. It was the meditation of a true movement.
    I noticed, again with my mind)) that when you run, you control your breathing and thoughts also stop.
    Coming back to the normal road, she entered the darkness with a sense of anxiety, like immersion in the unknown. But there was a peaceful silence and there was something real in it, a void ... this is the meeting with Himself, this is Ya.
    Today, a wedding with a friend ... The body has not yet woken up, the mind has already begun its work. During the walk, the mind also tried to reason. I returned it at the moment now sending to watch the breath. Motivation ... awareness of the moment now, understanding where you are now, watching the emotions and feelings. When so, then there is happiness and bliss.
    ... Watching as one gestalt replaces another, I understand that life and death are only concepts of the mind. Life was called EVERYTHING, all the processes that are continuous and succeed one another, as the morning is replaced by the night, as winter replaces the autumn. And what about death? This is also EVERYTHING? I think yes. This is the end of the process-the completion of gestalt. This is part of gestalt. Only when it concerns the change of day and night, the Mind can observe and understand this phenomenon, without identifying itself with it. And when the Mind is identified with the body, he thinks that after the disappearance of the body, EVERYTHING ends. Because basically on the physically manifested, the Mind sees just that. The body was laid in a box and loaded into the ground and sprinkled with earth. But this is the beginning of a new process. Next begins or continues))) the journey of the soul. And when Um understands this, and begins to observe it, then comes the realization that death is only fear, it is the name of a phenomenon that is not clear to Mind. Identification and awakening. Here and now.
  • I do not remember walking. I remember only one cold. My whole being was with him: a freezing soul, my heart was rocking. ... only the game helped not to get involved. I focused on my heart, on the love in it. And it became a little warmer. It was already possible to take the next step.
    All day: my walk. Together with his soul, I go my way of destruction. The destruction of the former me, I do not know a new self yet. There is no loss. There is no terrible world of death. This world is only an illusion created by the mind. I accept my dying. I am led only by the Light. I want it.
    The day before my friend asked me to sit with her son tonight. And that means staying with her. And tomorrow is the last day of this exercise. A week ago I would have been worried and thought: how can I tell her that I should go for a walk in the morning, experiencing a heap of feelings and questions. But not now. At first I did not even understand that there would be such a coincidence. I just asked for the keys. Just went in the morning. No emotions. Only the mind gave a faint picture of memories, how I should have felt and guided myself. Has dissolved.
    Walk through the new streets. New forms of trees, a lot of garbage. Symbolically. One leaves, another comes. My way to go, I'll have to clean up the garbage collected by life, while I still have time ... to reach the Source. No choice. And yes, actually, I do not claim this choice. Later. My heart and my left shoulder ache. I already began to get used to this pain. Deeper into it more and more. Suddenly, the question arose: what do I want. The answer: to know the light, will be free. The pain suddenly seemed to be pulled out like a cork. The space was powerfully expanded and the heart was bathed in white light. And all around. After that, everything disappeared. Remained in the heart and shoulder blade is warmth and pacification. As if I were given a line of direct communication with God (beloved). Something inside has become one.
  • What is awakening? It's not easy to get out of bed and open your eyes. You can walk with your eyes open and continue to sleep. Excitement is when I realize where I am, who I am, what's happening around, what I feel, accept everything as it is, without evaluation. As in the movie "The Peaceful Warrior":
    - Where are you?
    - I'm here.
    - What time?
    - Now.
    - Who are you?
    - This moment.
    I went yesterday's route, but did not turn to the spring. Fears come from childhood (tales of Babu Yaga). How cool and interesting to live! Analogy: the path of walking, as living life - you can look out of fear (live in the past), but you can look back to assess the situation and revise the past in order to comprehend and gain experience and knowledge.
    I hardly woke up. The second night is such a strong and sweet dream. Like a child. When Consciousness awakens, the body can sleep peacefully (ha-ha-ha). I woke my son to school, hugged. I felt that from my heart there is such a strong flow of love for him. I am going out for a walk. At the crossroads I went straight on. I saw the road in a new way. I ask myself the question:
    - Who am I?
    The answer comes:
    - I am everything.
    But, in fact, in me there is joy, and anger, and love, and sadness, and strength, and weakness ... God is the ocean, and I am his drop. The scale is different, but the essence is one. The macrocosm and the microcosm. The excitement ... Now, I wonder if the death of the body is perceived, like the fact that it will never move, breathe. But the expression: Soul died, you killed my (or someone else's) Soul ... Soul eternal ... Then how? Perhaps the death of the Soul is when it falls asleep as a result of an event, an injury, under someone's conscious or unconscious pressure. She does not understand where she is, what's wrong with her, and, most importantly, who she is. The group "Aria" has a song with the following words:
    While you are alive, do not die, look at this world -
    For many here the Soul is dead - they are dead inside.
    But they walk and laugh, not knowing that they do not exist ....
  •  I walked without thinking, enjoying the moment now, watching the bodily sensations, missing the senses. And again asserted that already everything is there and nothing depends on us.
    Today morning is cold and windy. Yes, it also happens and this is also an experience. The man warms up the car, smokes and tramples on the spot from the cold. I watched the sensations and accepted them. Began to ask: Who am I? Who experiences these feelings? Haha !!! Nobody here. This is all illusory, there is only a moment now.
    I got out of the entrance. It was a bit sleepy. The car rushed past at a speed. Immediately woke up, thanked Consciousness. There was much gratitude for these morning walks. I walked and realized every moment, every step and movement that I did.
  • The body is asleep, my head is asleep, I wake up very late, ... I'm going faster than a soldier, I go out into the street. But here, I emphasize calmness on this ... everything is asleep, there are no people, no cars. And very warm.
    While jogging, I direct attention to the breath, everything in the district moves: the sun rises, time flows, the body moves. I notice that I'm not running around alone, but a man has appeared. Reflections begin: and when he runs, it is interesting he poses a problem, and which one? Then I remember myself, in general the goal is in front of me, and I return to it. The body was tightened, all unnecessary thoughts started. All the ideas were gone ... and began to notice the running and walking.
    Going to bed in the evening, I'm already tuning for a run, and today is not such a walk as usual. It's very cold, the moon is shining, and I'm walking with my parents. This area, causing fear, has not been here so early (or late). It is not clear how much time, all around without crowded, very quiet, even the dogs are asleep. I watch this time is not morning, but it is not night.
    The mood for the end of this event, I notice that the body is frozen, and somewhere the ego whines like it would hurry to heat ... but the other force is persistently walking, and there is cold, discomfort, fear.
    I go out and I remember the main task. I have thoughts, forget the task, I watch traffic on the street. People are in a hurry to study, work, work. Although it's still early, but already everything is moving. I note the freezing of the hands, how the cheeks freeze in a special way, and I feel the body wooden, clamped. I feel the icy air entering the wings of my nose. I pull on my collar. And somehow it is difficult to remember who I am? This One can not remember himself. The proposed conditions they immerse in sleep. I breathe without realizing, note this, I include awareness, observations. I see the desire to reach home. And keep warm. And sooner. I notice the step and rhythm of walking, I see the path that needs to be done, and moving already consciously. Not adding speed, but I keep the given rhythm.
  • The first walk. I had to get up earlier than usual: at 5.40. Head is heavy, on the verge of pain. Cold! With difficulty, "rolled out" into the street. Wandered between nearby houses. And in the moment now to visit it was not possible and to reflect. About my own awakening - probably something happens if I wander through this cold in the dark, feeling anxiety, loneliness and fear (fear of death). The second walk is more cheerful. Day off. She got up at 6.30. Practically slept well. Head light. In the body there are no strong painful sensations. Towards the end of the walk came full cheerfulness. The sky brightened. But for some reason, the brightening sky causes alarm. The third walk. Second day off. Easily got up at 6.30. I walked along the paths between the houses. I met a woman on a run. I was happy, in a way, like-minded. Changed the route. It's not so scary to wander alone. I look at the sky - a sense of defenselessness, which is insignificantly small! The question is: who is small? Who is scared? Of course, the mind has done a certain job. To whom? No answer. Fourth walk. MONDAY. 5.40 am. Where do I carry? -I ask. No, the mind asked. I do not respond. I show readiness for change, Awakening, and how much there is self-discipline. Who demonstrates? Just go-crawl. I remembered watching the movie Zen Master - Bodhidharma, an episode with the construction of a house ... And then just take a walk in the morning. And such nagging ... The fifth walk. 5.40. I'm coming. Wandering. I do some physical exercises. The body awakens, pleasant sensations in the body attract positive emotions. I want to do good to everyone. The sixth walk. 5.40. Cold! Physical exercises, this time no longer cause such vivid sensations and emotions. But I see that there is no walk or there is almost no inner resistance. There is some regret that this stage of the game will end. It was the GAMES that I took today. Seventh walk. Walking. Thoughts skip back and forth, past-future, memories-plans. On the senses I detain attention with difficulty. I do not feel cold, I do not feel the blocks. A little delay in returning from a walk.
    As a result, I fulfilled only part of the assignment: walks. Description, as in previous years, was at the end. Daily did not write down. Self-discipline is one of the weak points.
  •  I decided to write a general report on walks. I have no other choice. After an hour of shock that I did not save the report in the repository, I write spontaneously what I remember. About walks. When I barely made a walk and the description was scant, then there was no limit to the shame and fear of rejection, but now I understand that it was described enough about the walks that have been made. now I can not return the report completely back. On the first day, a rally with his daughter began, and he did not let me sleep because she needed a daughter's care around the clock, she was immobilized, was involved in the fear of losing her daughter, the temperature was 40 days 4 days. Walking without a pass helped to realize that I needed this experience right now and remembering other jokes they also seemed terrible and occurred just before the distance game or before another event. Walking without passes made from 30.11.17 to 6.12.17, but on the fifth day, I slept a whole hour for an hour. fell asleep in the morning when I got up and realized that the ego was saying what kind of a scoundrel I had overslept and it's too late to go for a walk and it does not count, start over, but here I saw the perception of the mind of a temporary interval and the belief that now I believe in being late And not in reality of awareness here and now. I gave myself 5 minutes to think and that's it: If the president said to transfer time on that day, it was on this fifth day of walks and would transfer the time an hour later, who would then think that later or early time and who now believes in delay? nobody, gathered for a walk and committed without guilt and torment about the violation of the rules of the assignment. Walking was not very easy. my state of health also worsened, I froze, apparently it's the fear of going to DI. Fear sounds like this: "I can not cope with this remote game silenok not be enough and the circumstances in the family are heavy. I'm in discomfort, you're a weak and useless player! '. And now I wondered, and when I was in comfort? Awakening in my opinion is an exit from sleeping comfort into the Clear vision mode, but in discomfort! Refuting the belief that earlier two years ago, I did tasks for fear of losing face, being abandoned, rejected, and finally ashamed of impotence after I died. Now there were tasks of walks naturally, without resistance not on the result, but on what is with understanding to Life from the side of the experience I needed. For several days I walked like a robot, with no interest and no attachment to the result, but with a clear awareness of the body. felt and missed any state for a walk and after. Of course during walks of thinking on the account of time, life, etc. I can not remember in detail because they were some not completely understandable and possibly exclusive and even transmitted not by my mind, but broadcast by those who I am not! By the end of the description of the report,
    I burst out laughing and with love for myself and the fact that I deleted the report, I realize right now that the game does not end in the allotted time by the teacher and does not begin exactly on 16.12.17 and the Game is right now, the Game is in me, I feel it and I see it! Thank you Rama for the timely appearance in my life, thanks for the Knowledge, For the Way- Live Here and Now under the name Game Lila!
  • The article is in the status COMPLETED.



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